MoistCr1TiKaL Addresses the "Is He Alive?" Rumors

It's a strange thing to see your own name pop up in Google search suggestions followed by the word 'dead.' But here we are. Apparently, this is a recurring mystery that the internet needs solved on a weekly basis, a constant inquiry into my mortality. For some reason, there's a whole contingent of people out there who are genuinely convinced I've ascended to the great beyond. I'm not sure what started it, but the rumors of my demise seem to have more legs than some actual marathon runners. It's the kind of morbid curiosity you can't even get mad at; it's just baffling. So, to clear the air once and for all: I am not currently haunting my recording studio as a disembodied spirit. The latest MoistCr1TiKaL content isn't being channeled through a medium. I'm still here, still making questionable life choices, and still getting unreasonably angry at broken video games. The only thing that's died recently is my patience for terrible game design. While everyone's out there holding a digital seance, I'm busy maintaining my status as the world's foremost expert on things that don't matter. It’s a full-time job, you know. This entire phenomenon is one of the internet's greatest mysteries, right up there with how some people can function without a sense of humor. So consider this video definitive proof of life. You're hearing it straight from the source—penguinz0 is still kicking. Unless this is a very advanced AI, in which case the robot apocalypse has a surprisingly monotone and sarcastic beginning. But yeah, for now, the reports are false. I am, unfortunately for some, still alive.